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I'm back Speaking of my marrage, the 29th of August was my six month anniversary and the fifth month anniversary of The Bear's leaving. It was a Sunday. It was also the day The Bear decided to call me, collect. He wouldn't tell me where he was except that he was in St. Louis. (He started the reply by saying he was a very long way away from me. I would say that was more of an emotional distance than actual geography.) He couldn't give me a reason for his leaving, he just said that he had to leave. The phone call was very short, maybe 10 minutes. He didn't say much of anything and it was his lack of any emotion - regret, pain, guilt - that really drove home how little that I had meant to him. He never said he was sorry, he never asked about his parents, my kids, our friends. He didn't ask about any of the consequences of his abrupt departure. He did ask, if I hadn't thrown them all away, if I could send him his papers that he had left behind. Not the pictures of his girls, not his clothes or personal items, not any of the presents that we had given him or momentos of our life together (brief as it was), no. All he wanted, it seems, was his birth certificate. In the middle of all this, I did manage to impart to him that we were in the middle of a divorce. He said he understood and that was that. I told him not to call me back and he said he wouldn't. Four years of friendship and six months of marriage, disolved in 10 minutes, with absolutely no emotion spent on his part. The cost on my part was much more tumultuous. I was very glad that he called while the kids were still sleeping and I could be alone. I still haven't told them he called. What would I say? Well, a lot of little things have happened since I last wrote and I'm sure lots have happened since I've last read any of my favorite diaries (Thanks to all who left me notes!) and I will catch up on things as sson as I can. Right now I have to go to work and since I work at three in the morning tomorrow, it'll probably be later tomorrow night before I can get back. Hugs to everybody, I've missed you more than you know! Adieu.
Most recent entries Something New - 2009-06-04 Lunch for Breakfast - 2009-05-18 Jeans and a T-shirt - 2009-05-13 Lost Weeks - 2009-05-11 Happy Birthday to Me! - 2009-04-22 |
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