Menopause

2009-04-15 at 10:17 a.m.


WARNING!!!! Female processes to be discussed.

Woke up this morning and realized I had five minutes to get to the doctors.

Made it in twenty and just avoided having my appointment canceled. (Looked like Hell, but I imagine she's seen worse...)

I sat in the waiting room for twenty-five minutes. Sat in the examining room for another thirty and then spent all of five minutes listening to her tell me almost all of my previous lab tests came out great. I spent a dollar a minute to wait uncomfortably in the always-too-cold offices. I guess the reading of my lab tests was gratuitous. Scheduled my next appointment for six months time.

My A1c (3 month average blood glucose levels) was 5.4 which is great for a healthy adult, fantastic for a diabetic such as myself. Actually, all my tests came back good, except my cholesterol levels. My HDL cholesterol (the good kind) was 45. No problem there. My LDL (the bad kind) was 109 (should be below 99). My main concern was my Triglycerides. They were 319. They should be below 149.

So now she's wanting to put me on meds for that. I have no health insurance. These meds are expensive. So she's gonna try Niacin first. Want to know the side effects of that one? "Flushing". What is Flushing? It's when the internal furnace kicks on and you feel like your on fire. Sound familiar?
I started laughing. Not in an I'm-amused-way, but in the you've-got-to-be-kidding-me kind of way. I call those episodes "power surges", my Mom calls them "hot flashes". I've had them on and off for the last four or five years. Now she wants me to take a medicine to induce them every night, on schedule. Yeah.

I used to think my episodes were caused by my high blood pressure, but I've been on meds and gotten that under control for the last two years. So I asked her why I would have them when I' NOT on Niacin. She looked at me so matter-of-factly and said, "At your age, menopause," and then dissmissed the rest of the conversation and went back to my prescription writing.

I'll be forty next Tuesday. I knew that was lurking around the corner. I was still shocked to hear the words come out of her mouth. So now, in my own obsessive compulsive way, I've got menopause on the brain wondering when all the other stuff is going to happen. Then I think, "What other stuff?" All I really know about menopause is that you have power surges, your period stops and your mood swings erratically.

Well, I've been having power surges for years now and I can switch moods at the drop of a hat (just ask the young'uns.) My period is alive and well and as far as I can tell, not going anywhere. I would much rather have those symptoms reversed. No period and waiting on the power surges and mood swings to show up. I started my period when I was seven. I'm over it already.

Needless to say, my OCD has kicked in and now I have to get off here and go research Menopause.

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